Hey ! So my second blog ,yup still doesn’t get easier.
I used to live for the weekends,wishing my life away until Saturday night rolled around.I was never stuck for people to socialise with and was always dolled up to the nines…however underneath it all I had such low self esteem….
I was the type of girl that used to hate eating In front of other people,and God forbid I was to go out with a fella for food I’d starve! “No Im not hungry thanks”Starving, salivating at the mouth looking at his food.ha Going on a night out I couldn’t possibly walk into a bar alone ,you’d send the text “I’m outside”so one of girls come out and escort u in!
With regards socialising, I’d have to have a few drinks before I head out for the Dutch courage,and no way in hell would I go near the, dance floor until I taught I was Beyoncé!
I was an emotional wreck and every little thing got to me,I over thought everything!!!
All of this sounds so sad but that was the reality of it! I was Not a strong confident woman,but fitness changed all that.I started getting compliments off women so then I didn’t care what males taught.I started to feel good about myself so I didn’t care what other people taught.
I learnt to go out and not drink and 9 times out of 10 I’m the one pulling the girls out on the dance floor.I now choose when I want to drink and not because everyone else is.
But most of all I’ve learnt to be selfish!!!I have stopped trying to please everyone.It’s ok to do NOTHING! Life can get so busy and sometimes you just need to switch off!I put myself 1st,I have stopped being paranoid and when those insecurities pop into my head I tell myself nobody gives a shit Marie! Lol
Because that’s the reality of it is nobody cares,there will always be people that try and drag you down,but the rest do they really care ???We are all just trying to get by! So Join that gym,go for your run,wear what you want and forget everyone else.Because in the end of the day we only get one life, so live it the way you want to…not the way you think u ought to.